The Ever Popular 4 Truths and One Lie

I learned to shave my balls, from two gay friends at twenty-one, who were so horrified at how "au natural" I had allowed 'the boys' to get that they made me pull my clothes off get in the shower with them naked and shaved them for me.

I called my father 'Ice Man' until late into my teens - when after a very physical altercation - and one of the first where I punched back, he began to cry and asked why I hated him so much.

I hated my father so much because I watched him pummel my mother like a rag doll one night sending her flying into a wall size book case which tumbled on top of her at the age of six.

From two years of age - to six, it was common to find me asleep in the smelly laundry of myself, my brother and my sister - piled in the hallway closet upstairs - in the middle of the night. Upon waking I would explain that I was chasing fairy dust through the house to where the fairies lived - but never found the elusive fairy.

From the age of two to the age of fourteen I did not have one dream or one nightmare that I could remember upon waking the following morning.