..had lunch with Chris today - followed by a need to stroke my own cock - um, I mean - SHIT CHRIS ROCKS!!!

uh Hey sexy muther-fuker....will you take a ride in my BMW - boy ????

I spend numerous hours a night just thinking - not brilliant thoughts, great poetic verses or concept-shattering,algorithms - just stream-of-conciousness ramblings, concerns, worries, anxieties, aspirations, desires, fantasies, reveries...these moments of thought, seem more like a great (ok - not so great - but usable) piece of machinery from the 1940's Industrial Propoganda adverts - all cogs, whistles and noisy, black parts - processing widgets. I get lost watching the widgets be pressed and shaped (designed in an irregular pattern to match their creator) and racing down the conveyor - my boyfriend frustrated stands on the sideline calling out to me "Dinners Ready", "Did you feed the dog?", "Can we have sex?" - and I just don't hear him, I forget where I am in a book, I miss half of the episode of 'Will and Grace" (...why is Karen dressed up as a magicians helper anyway??) and invariably I piss off my boyfriend. And in the end the widgets get spit down different tubes and those tubes turned out to be mismarked - "Cairo??? That part was going to Toledo?" - and I lose track of even why I was thinking this hard in the first place. Sometimes this aspect - this part of me - frustrates me (and others), sometimes it soothes me, sometimes it frightens me and sometimes...

What?? I don't know ? What was I saying anyway......

...well, went to "LA" over the weekend - that drive is killer at 5 hrs each way (if you dont get lost once in Los Angeles - which I did)...we did have a wonderful time seeing Patrick (why is it best friends never seem to live in the same city - is this secretly how you manage to stay best friends ?) - I would say the best parts of the weekend were hanging at the Abbey enjoying lunch, beer and friendship on Saturday afternoon and chilling at Here that evening (what a freak show - a very pretty "look at me I'm pretending to be rich, hung and powerful - and may be one or all of the above" - freak show, but a freak show none the less.)

People in LA are without a doubt the most unapproachable in the continental United States (comparing to say SFO, Chicago, Seattle, San Diego, New York and Phoenix - I haven't been to Atlanta or New Orleans yet - HINT, HINT!), not venting here but really, whats with all the chips on the shoulders and one-ups-man-SHIT. The bartender at the Abbey who really was so soothing to the eyes and at first seemed a twirling blend of apathy, disdain and charm - immediately said "Your not a LA boy are you?!", when I told him my boyfriend and I were from elsewhere he offered the Northern Midwest - "We just seemed more like those type of guys", still not sure if I was being complimented or not. Must be a "LA" thing.

Anyway here are me and my best buddies (my boyfriend and Patrick):